XAM – HELLP
Verse 1
I should have focused on the love
And my health before the fame
I should have told somebody how I felt
Instead of tightening the belt around my neck
I should have asked for help
But I’ve been asking myself everyday
If it’s too late for me to make a change
They say the grass is greener on the other side
But I took a look at mine and it looked dry
I guess they lied or maybe I am colorblind
Or maybe I forgot to give it water and I let it die
‘Cos that’s what I do with everything important in my life
Yeah, I make it disappear
I hide the evidence and act like it was never here
I pack my backpack and put it on my back real fast and leave
The murder scene behind my back and never looking back at my past again
Yeah, I really need a friend
I really need someone that I can let inside my head
I’m in hell… help! I’m lonely and afraid
I really need somebody by my side until the end
Chorus
‘Cos nobody ever taught me how to deal with depression
So I’m doing this my way without any lessons
I’m writing down my thoughts into my book of confessions
And then I'm reading them out loud at my therapy sessions
Verse 2
But It’s not working and I don’t know why
Maybe I was made to be unhappy ‘til the day I die
Or maybe my only purpose in life is to hate being alive
‘Cos every single second of my life feels like a waste of time
I got bad thoughts on my mind and It's my fault I know
I should have never closed my eyes and gone blind I know
I should have never lied to myself everytime that I said
”I’ll be fine” ‘cos I'm not fine
I don’t even know if I’m alive anymore
Chorus x2
‘Cos nobody ever taught me how to deal with depression
So I’m doing this my way without any lessons
I’m writing down my thoughts into my book of confessions
And then I'm reading them out loud at my therapy sessions
